*Please note that I am in no way affiliated with Lysa TurKeurst or Proverbs 31 Ministries. This is my own work using Lysa's book Made to Crave as reference. Thank you - Jennifer.*
I have a bad case of the "I don't wannas".
I don't wanna clean.
I don't wanna get up out of my nice warm bed.
I don't wanna eat carrots and salad when it's cold outside.
I don't wanna get off my butt and exercise.
I just don't wanna.
That is one of the most challenging parts of changing your eating lifestyle, isn't it?
Let's face it, no matter who I point fingers at, or what failed diet plan I blame, the fact remains:
There's a reason I'm unhealthy, and it's all about me.
I start, I stop. I start, I stop. I start . . . I stop.
I have done:
Atkins, South Beach, the Blood Type Diet, Lean Bodies, Weight Watchers, the Eden Diet, Weight Watchers again, Spark People, fasting, starvation, calorie counting, sugar counting, fat counting . . . The works.
The problem is not that these do not work.
The problem is that I don't have enough will or desire to stick with them.
This is something that I know I have addressed more than a few times on this blog.
Let's face it, this is something that affects me daily.
But here's the thing, my "want to" has, in the past, been tied to the wrong things.
A better body. Looking good. Fitting into a certain size . . .
See where I'm going with this? Vanity. My want to has been tied to my vanity for my entire life.
So what has to change? What do I need to do to change that for me?
I have to realize that it can no longer be about things like size or looks.
The point of this rant?
I am a food addict, plain and simple. My lack of will comes from the same place that a crack addict's or smoker's might come from. This is where there has to be a focus shift.
All of these diet and eating plans didn't work for me because they forced me to think consistantly about the one thing that was taking me away from my God. Food. Food was my golden calf, my idol, my false God. When I was depressed, I turned to brownies, chips, ice cream . . . Did the same thing when I was happy.
I was not turning to God.
Daily my focus was around food: what I was going to eat, what I was eating, what I was going to eat later. I made meal plans, counted points/calories/carbs/etc., scoured cook books and recipe web sites. I spent hours staring at Paula Deen and Rachael Ray on the television. Then I'd look at the scale and wonder why I'd gained a pound that week.
The entire focus of Made To Crave is that God should be the center of our lives, not food. When we search for that will, that desire, that "want to", we need to be searching for that in the Father. Like the song says: "we are weak, but HE is strong".
Jesus told the rich man to give everything away. He told his followers to rebuke their selfishness and "take up your cross and follow Me" (Matthew 16:24). In other words, give up the thing that means more to you than Jesus. For some, that sacrifice is money. For some, drugs or alcohol. But for even more of us, that is food.
Not that we have to stop eating entirely, mind you. That's not the point. The point is that we should re-think how we view food in our lives. Are we replacing God with food? Are we eating when we should be praying? Are we focusing on our meals for the day or on God's grace?
It's certainly something to think about.
Next Week: My Sacrifice