Can't Get My Act Together

One of the things my wonderful WW meetings leader, Christy, tells us is "find what motivates you!"
But for some reason, I can't find that motivation this week.
I think about seeing my kids grow up, graduate high school.
I think about being hot by the time I'm 40.
I think about being able to shop at the "normal" size clothing stores.
And yet, I still pick up that chip and put it in my mouth.

But motivation can't always come from those things. Motivation is something that has to come within. No matter how hard you try to convince yourself otherwise, it just will not come from without. You have to push yourself - no one can do it for you.

For example, I had several choices today - chips, celery, carrots, apples, WW ice cream, cherries, and grapes.
I chose chips.
I chose ice cream.
I chose chips again.
Why?
Because they were there.
No one made me eat them.
No one handed them to me.
It was all me.

I am learning something about myself here -
I am not like some other WW's people I know.
Some of them can have things in the house, and measure, and only eat the portion size, etc. I am not one of those people.
There are just some things that I am going to have to accept that I can't have them in the house.
For me, it's more than just counting points.
It's more than just getting in my good health guidelines.
It's a fight for my life.
It's a fight against an addiction that I have struggled with since childhood.
I have to stand up against this addiction and say NO MORE.
It's time I get control and find that motivation in me.

Here's to being losers in 2011!